Do you know what one of my favorite things is? I love meeting up with friends at a local coffee shop for a good heart-to-heart. On a Fall day, when the morning air is crisp, I prefer to sit in the big comfy chairs near the fireplace. I slip off my shoes and curl my legs up all comfy-like as I wrap both hands around my coffee mug and bring it up next to my face so I can feel the steam and inhale the rich, sweet aroma. Face-to-face we share what’s been happening in our lives, both our joys and our burdens, and when our time comes to an end I leave knowing that I am blessed to have such great friends.
Maybe you’ve noticed that I haven’t been here on the blog much lately. Maybe you’ve discerned from my last few posts that my heart has been a bit downcast.
It has been one year since we moved to South Carolina and I think it’s finally hit me that the way I once did life with old friends is not the way it will be now. Many old friends have drifted away and I don’t even see them much on Facebook anymore. That’s pretty natural I guess, for those that were more surface friends. For those that remain close we’ve found different ways of staying in touch, though it will never be as satisfying as face-to-face over coffee.
I hate to be a “Debbie Downer” (a big sorry to all you Debbies) but I want to be honest and real. Fall has always been the hardest season for me because of the Seattle gloom, but even living in sunnier South Carolina I find myself having a bit of a rough time. Sure, we’ve begun to create some great friendships here, with some really amazing people that God has brought into our lives, but since we’ve been traveling into the next city to attend church we haven’t really made friends in our own community. I haven’t found any girlfriends nearby that I can text and say, “Wanna meet for a cuppa’ Joe?”
Tweet ThisThis sadness has made me lose much of my “zest” for blogging. Then there is the part of me that says, “Here I am, the Freedom Session lady, in a great big funk! Where is my freedom? What kind of example can I be?”
I KNOW that we aren’t to walk in self condemnation and I KNOW that I haven’t lost my freedom just because I feel sad. In fact, sadness is perfectly normal given all the changes we’ve made this past year (hubby’s job, moving far from friends and family, leaving behind a thriving ministry that we loved, losing our Snoopygirl, plus a few physical issues that have cropped up). But sadness isn’t where I want to stay and, as Mr. OTN says, staying stuck is not an option.
So today I want to share some NEW THINGS I’m doing to press forward into this new life of mine:
- First, since Mr. OTN doesn’t like to see me sad he recently made the decision, and I quickly agreed, that we need to start searching for a church in our own city. At first that idea made me even sadder as I felt like we would be starting all over again, but it’s not like we are really starting over because we will continue to remain friends with those we’ve come to know. So we’ve been church hunting and will be trying out a new church close to home for awhile, to see if we are a good fit.
- The second “new thing” is that I’ve begun writing for a new site called Faith ‘n Friends. This site is made up of several inspirational bloggers who will be coming together to share and encourage our readers. We will also be hosting a weekly link party on Fridays where you will have the chance to link up your own encouraging thoughts. I’ll be sure to keep you updated as to our start date in October.
- A third “new thing” is that I am getting back into a regular exercise routine. For me, that is always a great mood booster. My broken wrist last Spring and the resulting nerve damage threw me, big time. The healing process has been very slow and being on the computer has been especially aggravating. I can now swim again without pain and have been able to do some modified Pilates exercises, so I am committing anew to becoming strong in body!
- “New thing” number four is that I will be continuing to work on the book that I started writing (yeah, I probably never told you I had a book in me) and stepped away from due to lack of time and lack of confidence.
- “New thing” number five, I (we) will continue to wait on the Lord and see what doors he opens for us to give back to others what we’ve so freely been given. It has been over a year since we were directing Freedom Session and both Mr. OTN and I feel that we are not at our best if we aren’t sharing our hope with others.
- Number six, for the second year I will be attending the Allume blogger’s conference in October in hopes of getting answers to some questions I’ve been struggling with. Does my blog format need to change? Are there aspects of my blog that I need to step away from? Are there things I need to add? Even . . . should I just stop blogging altogether? I’m hoping to gain some clarity at the conference.
Thank you SO much for sitting down and listening to me today. I know that I am blessed to have great and encouraging readers like you and I hope you know how much I appreciate you. It’s your turn to share now, because even in the midst of my own stuff I care about what’s happening in your lives. What’s on your mind? What are your thoughts about MY thoughts? Have you experienced similar feelings? What kind of things are you going through now? Do you have any victories to share? Maybe we can even pray for one another!
We are all work in progress and the story is not finished yet!
Blessings sweet friends,
I have been know to link to the following Inspirational Parties:
Wednesdays A Wise Woman Builds Her Home Wednesday Prayer Girls Woman to Woman Word Filled Wednesdays A Little R & R Whole Hearted Home So Much at Home Mom’s Morning Coffee Women with Intention Coffee for Your Heart Capture Your Journey
Thursdays Serving Joyfully/Thriving Thursdays The Deliberate Mom/Shine Blog Hop I Choose Joy Live Free Thursday Thought Provoking Thursday Imparting Grace
Fridays A Look at the Book Christian Mommy Blogger Fellowship Fridays Blessing Counters Missional Women Faith Filled Fridays Faith & Fellowship Bloghop Grace & Truth Linkup Grace&TruthSharingRedemption’sStories Dance With Jesus The Weekend Brew
Saturdays Still Saturday The Weekend Brew Saturday Soiree Recommendation Saturday Make My Saturday Sweet
Sundays Spiritual Sundays Sunday Stillness
Hi Patti!! I’m still here… Far away, but close in heart. Thank you for sharing your heart. We went from August to October with no Sept in between. The leaves are changing and falling off the trees. It’s dreary, gray, and sometimes wet too. So I too am battling the seasonal change. I am entering week three of an inductive Bible study in Philippians. It’s really good. I’m meeting some very dear women, and have already found two women who can be mentors in my life. I have not had that since I’ve had you in my “nearby” life. So nearly 9+ years doing it solo. All that to say, I am glad to hear you’re visiting a closer church. I had a hard time connecting, knowing the realities of driving far to connect frequently would be tough. I’m glad you can go to your blogging conference. My input is, “It’s great the way it is. Don’t change it!!” But I’m not a blogger!!!! So, have a super fun time with fellow bloggers as well as learning new tips and insight!
I’m currently sitting at our last garage sale (at least for this year). I’m enjoying the blessing of the type of people we have in our community, as well as focusing on the fact that our Lord has truly got a plan for our lives. Even if it meant leaving friends and paradise, He has a bigger picture for us here. He has one for you too. Keep up the good work and keep on persevering as you trust in Him!
And finally, to wrap up this quick “coffee break”, I’m saving all the talkable stuff to share while we have real coffee together in October! I can not wait, my dear friend!! We will talk soon!!!
I have a sense that you and I are struggling with some “similar” things….for TOTALLY DIFFERENT REASONS. After losing my husband of 54+ years on this date 25 months ago I wondered if I would continue writing /my blog. My victory is that I have survived these 25 months. Oh it’s not done, over but I have so much to be thankful for- the loving wise support of our 4 children who have encouraged me to “be me” and not try to live this new life according to what the world around me thinks..I’m still learning but it seems so slow ; I suppose that goes back to the simple cliché we often hear: Take it one step one day at the time. Putting one foot ahead of the other. So simplistic but I ‘get it’.I am still trying to figure out this writing blogging thing…what it should now look like. When I began all I knew was my reason for doing it and my inspiration for the name. Now I’m trying to sort out [as you are] what my “keepers” are and what is just fluff and of no real benefit. This is too much…perhaps another time. Thank you for listening also.
Jonell so, so sorry for your loss. 54 years is a long time. I celebrated 46 this year. I can’t imagine how hard it must be for you to blog right now, and have never thought of that. I love blogging. I had started a book about our dog, and he unexpectedly passed away and I lost that zeal, but that was just a dog. I have just lifted you in prayer and thankful that I clicked on Patti’s link this morning. God does those little things because usually I am in such a rush to get to school I don’t have time to click and read others blogs much. Hang in there! I pray God will give you some words to write as you walk through these coming days.
Hey girlfriend! Your blog is always so inspirational even when you’re not feeling your best. God uses us as we are, as long as we are willing. I’ve also stepped away from my cancer blog and another severely neglected one I call Movie lines frought with meaning. Anyway, moving can bring so many challenges and finding a new church home is one of my biggest testimonies… Remember to be open to where God can use you, night where you’re most comfortable. We witnessed in a bad part of Detroit once we became open to this. Call anytime, if love to hear your voice! Gotta run, kids just jumped on the van… Such is my life with 5 now! Love you!
Hi Patti, my dear friend of so many years.I wish I could call you up and meet for coffee tomorrow morning 🙂 it’s a bit chilly and spitting a few rain drops here this evening.I truly understand your struggle moving so far from home.there are just times it is wonderful to be out in your community and run into neighbors and friends, not so easy when one has moved 3,000 miles from home.But Good has a plan, He will surely be using you there just as he did here.
Grrrrr okay site wanted to cut me off not sure if this posted or not.So! Stay strong, go forward, keep writing, and focus on Jesus…easy to say…sometimes very hard to do.I too am learning how to walk a different path these days.Thank God for my children I don’t know what I would do without them trying to find my way thru this new life without my beloved hubby with me.I think I am jealous he is in heaven and I’m still struggling down here, but God has a plan He isn’t thru with us yet Patti
Patti,
Blessings upon you, dear friend!!!
The transitioning one goes through with a “major” move is never easy.
I do believe that being connected within your community may prove helpful.
Once we “settled~in” on this side of the Prairie, we began to join small groups of fellowship and worship.
That was the one key that opened doors for us to meet and make new life~long friendships.
Joining a Women’s Circle Group that meets once monthly has strengthen my faith in amazing ways.
God may be calling you into other unknown areas of His ministry.
“Mr. Ed” and I are about to partake of our Annual Vacation.
But, our vacation is more. . .it’s also, a couple’s retreat!!!
During our days away, we listen for God’s calling for the upcoming year in our lives. . .
together as a couple and as an individual. It is an exciting time!!!
I feel God brought us to this place on the Prairie to “get up to speed’ in His Ministry.
Perhaps He has placed you in your new community to “slow~down”.
Lean on Him while you write your book and begin a new ministry based blog.
What we can see in part, He knows the whole!!!
You, dear one, are not alone. . .many friends are near, you have but to call out to us!!!
Fondly,
Pat
I know the felling, but I find that I can live with it. I just hate that it’s this way for my kids. But my trust is in The Lord, and I believe He will make a way for us to move from this area. Be blessed and encouraged! I know HE has a plan. (Susan)
Patti, All I can say is “I can SO relate!” Since retiring from doing worship for the international ministry 2 years ago, I still don’t know where my church home is. After traveling often and being with my team and all the wonderful “family” associated with that ministry — they truly were my church family — I stay connected with them, but it isn’t the same. And even though that ministry has a spiritual son who has started a church…they meet 40 minutes from my house. How in the world do I build community when everyone is coming in from all over the DFW area, and only a few live in the community where the church meets? Thankfully, I have kingdom family close by who I’ve known and loved for years and they are always there for me…but a church family would be nice. You encouraged me in sharing your heart…because I, too, have been in church and ministry transition…and that is never a fun place to be! Thanks for you transparency…for being bold enough to share your heart!
I enjoyed this post because you shared so transparently and bravely. Transition doesn’t come easily to me either. May God lead you in this season of life & bless you with those close by to enjoy coffee with! Glad to have been neighbors this morning at Weekend Whispers!
I love hearing and reading the honesty in your words. All of the new things you listed are big and brave for you and I will be praying as you take these steps. I am excited that I will be able to share Allume with you and feel we are both seeking answers to some of our writing questions. God is so good and will show up big as we open our hearts wider to Him. Love and hugs! Thank you for sharing this at Weekend Whispers.
I think… your heart spoke to mine in numerous ways today. thanks
Although I am not a consistent viewer I find your blog brings me comfort and feelings of having a Christ connected friend. One who understands the needs of someone going through life changes. Retired social worker and struggling with health issues, I feel isolated from both my work and church communities. Sadly I am in need of soul restoration and realize that it seems like I am “forsaking ” joining together. So finding this post is truly a God sent gift pointing in the right direction. Praying for you, that God will comfort you and send people your way that will bless you and them. Perhaps they too are in need of “coffee shop” friendships. Bless you and yours!
Same issues, different reasons. I finally decided that blogging gives me insight into what makes me happy and at least for now, that’s enough. I don’t want to feel that this hobby is a chore since I’ve met so many wonderful online friends because of it. Sometimes my online friends are more in-tune to my heart than my at-home friends because we are all so busy. Blogging gives us a nugget of truth to share with each other. As for church, find somewhere that uplifts your spirit and needs you rather than you needing it — maybe it’s time for you to seek a new ministry that you never before considered. And stay strong. We love hearing from you.
Wow, I just now received this in my inbox….the 19th!
Anyway…..my dear and sweet friend…..I feel your sadness and your unsettled feelings. I know it’s not always easy doing everything you’ve been doing/going through for well over a year now. But you are coming through it in really fine shape….. yes, you ARE!
Here’s a blessing in disguise for you: all these happenings you have faced have come one, or two, at a time. Just enough so that God could take His time to polish you a little more. Imagine how difficult it would’ve been had you been bombed with all of it at one time. That tired ole cliche of, “If God brings you to it, He will take you through it”, still rings true….even if we occasionally roll our eyes when hearing it applied to ourselves. (ask me how I know 😉 )
And we don’t have to be in Washington State to feel gloomy when the weather isn’t the brightest….even when the weather IS the brightest, sometimes we just cant’t see the Bright or see the Glory. And He knows the reason why. And He is always there, behind the dark cloud, letting us figure it out for ourselves….and then the Spirit rejoices with us when we see that amazing light again….He made us. He made us to feel things. Hahaha, and some of those things we feel, we can thank EVE for!
You know how the river rocks got so smooth? They stood their ground as long as they could, but finally had to turn this way and that way, and were moved and shuffled about….and as they kept moving along, they began to see subtle changes in themselves, until one day they were settled in a clear, quiet pool of water and they rested. One day someone came along and picked up one of the rocks…..and the rock heard a squeal and then….”LOOK! How BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECTLY SMOOTH this rock is…..how did that happen? No sharp edges at all…..wow, this is so pretty.” And God’s glory was opened to yet one more soul.
God created mankind, the world, and everything for GLORIOUS PURPOSES. Even that river rock has a glorious purpose. In Ps 139 it says, I praise Him because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. wow, what a statement of truth, and an honor it is to be fearfully and wonderfully made by the Hand of God.
You, Miz Patti, are fearfully and wonderfully made and He’s trying to show you and Mr OTN a little more of the glorious purposes He has planned for you. “REJOICE AND BE GLAD IN IT”!
Ok, I’m getting down off this lofty moment now before I fall and break a leg or something!
Patti, You are so loved. So admired. So respected. And so kind to share your heart and your Maker with anyone who will listen. You just keep listening to the ONE who truly has your best interests at heart. It’s His plan and He will get you there.
Love to you.
Sharon
Sharon… I want to thank you for your encouraging words. No… they weren’t meant for me… but they still warmed my spirit. You have a wonderful gift. [hugs]
We live in the Portland, Oregon area so I know what you mean about the fall gloom. But the rain is especially good this fall because of the hot and dry summer we had so I’m looking at the rain as a blessing. It also has helped with several wild fires that have been out of control. Keep your chin up and pursue those news things and My guess is that you will find some treasures just where you are !!! Blessings.
Patti, we moved to Texas three years ago by choice and it is home. We were living in Oklahoma for 23 years though for my husband’s job and raising our kids. It was such a wonderful 23 years. We are happy to be here but the beginning was rough!! I missed my people just like you said. Missed familiar surroundings. Missing running into people I knew when I was out running errands. I even thought I could die somewhere and nobody would have a clue who I was. That’s being dramatic but hey, it did enter my mind. It has taken time and lots of stretching and faith. I don’t things will ever be quite the same because the friends we have in Oklahoma are the friends we made while raising babies. Those can never be replaced because that’s such a bond. It will get better…I promise. Finding a church closer to home will really help. We aren’t involved in a church at all since we moved here because we have some family dynamics that make us feel like we don’t fit in at church these days. That makes me a little sad but it’s life. All of this rambling to say…it will get better because you are trying. 🙂
Stopping by from Weekend Brew; pleased to meet you here! having moved M.A.N.Y. times i hear your heart… but so glad to read that you are on the right path and the comments suggest that you have friends galore on line. God will fill in the empty spaces between in due time.
I’ve never commented on your blog, but I’ve read several of your recent posts and I do hope you are seeking professional help for your depression. If you are religious you will obviously find solace in that, but I sense that you really need a mild anti-depression drug to get you through this period. I speak from experience…and you may not need to be on it for an extended period in order for it to be effective. Best wishes…oh, and the exercise is a splendid idea as well.
Hi Patti, thank you for being real…no wonder I love your blog. I thought it was because we both lived in Seattle & moved to the south. We are having trouble finding a church close to our home too, but I know there are great plans for both of us. This too shall pass… Cheryl Ann
We indeed are work in progress! I pray that as you walk through this desert time that you will continue to turn to Christ. Nothing is outside the Lord’s sovereign ordaining. Since he has brought you to this time of isolation you can be sure that He means it for your good and for his glory. As you wait on Him to provide a closer church and godly sisters to fellowship with I pray that you will find peace. I look forward to hearing all the God will do in your life. I looks like you have some wonderfully creative ideas.
Hi Patti:
Having just finished treatment for breast cancer, I found the biggest comfort was thanking HIM in all things good and bad. I began thanking HIM for entrusting me with cancer because I knew HE had big plans for me that would glorify HIM. After I began saying this all the time all of the sudden HE gave me the grace to get through it. It wasn’t a walk in the park but it wasn’t too bad either. I had 16 chemo treatments and 33 radiation treatments and I would not change a thing – it was THE MOST BEAUTIFUL EXPERIENCE I HAVE EVER GONE THROUGH (even the hair loss!)!! And I am happily married with six kids. So take time to Thank Him for these changes in your life and know that He will give you the grace to overcome and keep on keeping on – better than you would have ever imagined.
Trisha
Oh Patti, I do believe you’ve touched the heart of many in what you’ve shared. I hope all of your goals come through beautifully. It’s a timely post for me as I too have stepped back a bit; posting only a couple times a week.
I’ve been investing more in my real life; in quiet time with the Lord, initiating time with friends to grow our relationships, getting my home decluttered and keeping myself at a better place for my husband. It seems there are seasons when stepping back is needed so more important things can be stepped into; finding the balance that is best for us, our families and pleasing to the Lord.
I recently read that it isn’t often the Lord reveals just how He is using us, we often won’t see the impact we have on others. So remember, just because the season is changing and a little sad…we are growing and still being used.
Many blessings Sweetie,
Cindy
(I sure wish we could meet for a cup of coffee!)
Hi Patti, It is Sunday and I was just reading your Blog and feeling a bit discouraged myself. I’m usually in Sunday School at this time but I was in a craft faire on Sat. and was so tired and hurting that I just am staying home. So reading your Blog I was feeling empty and sad and thought “should I be doing all this or should I just give up”? The good Lord usually directs my life, but today I feel so alone and empty. Sorry for crying on your shoulder. Maybe I’ll just get on my knees and wait for an answer. Thanks for listening.
Patti loved, loved hopping over here this morning and reading your words of honesty and truth and your new things. That picture at the end is worth a thousand words. Enough said!
Patti, reading this I was thinking, “Oh, maybe she should go to a Christian writer’s conference.” I went to my first one in July and actually met some new friends (not closeby, but new friends with the same interests, nonetheless). So when I read that you’ll be attending the Allume conference, I said, “Yay!” I bet you’ll be so blessed. You’re in a transition and I think that the older we get, the harder transitions can be. To leave all these established friendships, etc has got to be tough, but you’re making lots of positive changes. As far as the confidence thing with the book? I know that very well-just write! Laura Boggess (Lauraboggess.com) is doing an online book club of the book, “The RIght to Write” by Julia Cameron. Even if you don’t join the study, check out the book. It is transforming my writing, and freeing me to just write and not think. I have to say, your description of the coffee shop made me want to be there!!!
I get you. Oh, do I “get” you. Our paths have mirrored each other, to some extent, even with the church hunt, in the past year or two. Having been a military wife, I always scratched my head as to why moving wasn’t easier. Why, Lord, is this change so hard? The last move (to a new state, OK, after retiring from the military) has been the most difficult for us. We’re in unfamiliar territory, and it’s not always comfortable. But you’re on to something, Patti. God. You’ve put steps into action. Good for you! You’re reaching out. Even better! You’re reaching up. The best! I’ll be reviewing a book called Girl Meets Change by Kristen Strong on my blog Friday. I would definitely suggest it for any “mover” or woman facing change. Food for thought for your walk. The Lord used Kristen to set my thoughts in perspective, in ways I’d never considered. Be encouraged and keep walking. (And, by the way, I found 1 friend whose consistent and daily outreach through fb messages has helped keep me afloat. She’s all the way in CA and I’m in OK. Distance has proven to be nothing for God. Maybe one friend would be willing to reach out every day through prayer, chat, or encouragement somehow if you ask them?) Be encouraged!
Patti… I’m so glad you chose to be ‘real.’ You have become increasingly more transparent with time and it is simply beautiful. My heart feels your hurt in a big way. I’m not going to tell you things will be better because I don’t know that… but I do know that God is faithful and he will love you and walk with you through the days ahead. And he is enough. That I know.
Big hugs my sweet friend!!!!